First I Met My Children, Then My Girlfriend

A former sperm donor, searching online, finds both offspring and love.

I didn’t meet my girlfriend, Jessica, until 12 years after our daughter, Alice, was born.

Let me explain. Nearly 25 years ago, I returned from a year of teaching English abroad, moved in with my mother and, lacking prospects, began driving a cab. One day I saw a newspaper ad seeking healthy men, 18 to 35, to participate in a semen donation program.

“Donors” is the standard industry word, yet virtually all of us are paid. Forty dollars a pop was what I received in 1994.

I applied to sell my sperm and sold twice weekly for a year. At the time I was in a long-distance relationship, so this seemed like a good outlet. When I told my mother, she presciently wondered aloud if this was the only way she was going to have grandchildren.

Today, sperm buyers view detailed profiles for potential vendors, whereas I wasn’t asked to provide much beyond college major, hobbies and family health history. Jessica and her partner at the time chose me primarily because I was a writer and musician... (continues)